What is "Cheating"?

Hello everyone.

A few days ago Days Leaper, asked on HP's Answers "Why is it called cheating or being unfaithful", so I'll try to explain a bit of this in this hub from a personal perspective.

With this Hub I'll try to review and explain a few things such as relationship, stages and cheating itself.

As individuals, we set ourselves a wide set of goals that we which to achieve at some point, most of those goals involve others, weather it is for a a few one-night stands or to form a family. This is when we get into a love relationship.

When we get into a relationship we do it to satisfy some needs, for example, the need for company or a confident, someone who can support you, sex, image, sharing, etc. And as all kinds of relationships, it comes with a pre set of rules, which are agreed by a consensus of society, however sometimes these rules can change from couple to couple or from person to person, depending on what we seek or need.

However on most cases, having a relationship is a part of life where we seek that special someone, our other half in which we try to find this which we said would be our goal. A person which can match the criteria we set as we grow up for a person to have, to complete us and to give us what we think we need (Honestly, people barely know what they really want, which makes us change the standards we set for our life partners)

Stages

However, we all grow up differently, some of us achieve certain stages before others or simply we skip the stages because we believe we don't need them. To this is what most people refers to as "being on the same page", as we compare our life to a book and we both must be reading the same page to match.When we're both looking for the same.

For example, one of the most common cases why we can't find that perfect someone (or at least we can't stay with them for as long as we'd like) is because they're on a different page, they can meet all your requirements and perhaps even exceed them, but when you're looking for a steady relationship and to start the grounds of the rest of your life, they just want to jump from bed to bed, seeking nothing else but personal pleasure. In this case, we can see that we're on different stages. If we both are on the same page, we will not be looking for other things out there.

Cheating

Ok so getting straight to the subject (which is pretty small even though its the core of all this), when you get in a relationship you make a sort of pact/contract/agreement which you can't see or sometimes you don't even as one but you go creating through your time together with your partner, however there usually are some clauses set by a consensus such as: being Exclusive to each other, supporting each other's back, always being true, try your best to make the other happy and so on...

Now, I do believe there must be a clarification that needs to be made, cheating is only when you're completely conscious of your actions and you are still willing to keep going. For example, would ti be cheating if someone is done to you that you don't want to do? A rape for instance? (Rather dramatic but explains the point :P). No. When you cheat you're completely aware of what you're doing, wishing you wont get caught and enjoying the moment.

Getting back to the subject, you're basically breaking up your promise and deceiving your partner, someone who put his/her faith in you, as an individual and as a couple. If you get in a relationship you're expected to stick to the rules and abide them, not bend them to your personal convenience.

Even though cheating is one of the worst things you could possibly do to your partner, you can always try to work it out, by committing again and learning from your mistakes, making it up and showing that it was a simple mistake and you really care.

Talk about it, try to figure out what went wrong, a lot of the issues in a relationship aren't just one person's fault, it usually takes two for a problem to become important and working it out is a part of life and will surely help you grow up, perhaps it can even bring you to even closer than anything else :)

Some days your mother and me loved each other. Other days we had to work at it. You never see the hard days in a photo album... but those are the ones that get you from one happy snapshot to the next.- Mr. Leezak

Hope this could have answered Days Leaper's question, if there are any more questions I could forgot to cover on this article, let me know and I'll try to complete it :)

Greetings!